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Sunday, November 21, 2010

SBL Weekend Breaking News Headlines

For Next Week:

= Bristol Palin Eliminated From ABC Dancing With The Stars Competition (AP)

= Sarah Palin Attacks Hikers Near Wasilla Following Daughter's Elimination From TV Dancing Show (Anchorage Daily News)

= Willow Palin Tells Barbara Bush to STFU! Evades Security at Walker's Point Compound and Beats Former First Lady Unconscious with Empty Vodka Bottle. (Boston Globe)

= Emotionally Disturbed Chicago Man and Palin Cult Devotee Kevin "Cupcake" Dujan Sets Himself On Fire Outside ABC Studio in Los Angeles To Protest Dance Contest Decision (LA Times)

= One Dead and Several Injured in PUMA Chocolate Chip Double Waffle Buffet Riot Inside Waffle House in Clarks Summit, PA Following Televised Dance Show. (Times Leader/Abington Journal)

p Local Man Bob Somerby Abducted by Rubes - Developing... (SquirrelNet)

= FOX News and Glenn Beck Implicate Financier George Soros and New Black Panther Party in Secretive Voter Fraud Conspiracy to Deny Bristol Palin Dancing Prize (World Net Daily)

= BULLY PULPIT: Obama Agrees to Suspend Bipatisanship; Announces "Too many white people these days really are motherfuckin' insane" and Agrees to Jeralyn Merritt Plan to Nationalize Televised "Reality" Programming.

= Hell Freezes Over (The Weather Channel)

= John McCain Apologizes to America (USA Today)


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6 comments:

pansypoo said...

MEH! LOSERS ARE NOT WORTHY. FUCK THE MEDIA,

NO WANT!!!!!!!

the farmer said...

after hell freezes over the only media thing left is USA Today. and John McCain.

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pansypoo said...

pfft. it is all USA today NOW!

pjk said...

I guess that means the USA Ta-Day has a Mandate to tell us what anything Really means, right?

But please, only with a cute pie chart or bar graph. Or show me how fat & stupid we've gotten with a ripoff of the Michelin Mans profile.

farmer- we ain't ponied up for digital tv, and ours freezes and gets pixelated too. Leads you to believe it's something they can turn on & off with a switch, or perhaps slip a filter or amplifier in line- so they may bend you over for another "nominal" increase on the bill.

WTF is with the 24/7 cable bitchfest over airport screening?

Too Intrusive? I thought it was a different world after 9/11. Or maybe some folks want the option of having the Scary Brown People kicked off "their" plane, and screening deprives them of that Gawd-Given right.

Try having the distinction of STILL being on a No-Fly list, because you once said something less than salutory about G-Dub of one of his chosens.

Liked the Packer game, the Eagles game, and the end result of the Nascar "chase".

Can anyone tell me if the results would have been different if they still went by the old system?

the farmer said...

I guess that means the USA Ta-Day has a Mandate to tell us what anything Really means, right?

Thats correct. That will be the case after Hell freezes over. And there will only be two shows on TV - Meet the Press with David Gregory interviewing John McCain once a week over and over again for infinity and the other show will be a video of Sarah Palin beating a halibut to death with a cricket bat named Margaret Thatcher - which will play in a continuous loop over and over and forever - 24/7.

farmer- we ain't ponied up for digital tv, and ours freezes and gets pixelated too.

It happens on old formerly analog tvs too. The transmission signal is digital.

WTF is with the 24/7 cable bitchfest over airport screening?

Yeah, suddenly the whole profiled, pulled over and patted down experience has come home to roost for the exceptional peoples. TSA needs to take a tip from FOX News and hire a bunch of dingy dribble heads wearing japanese schoolgirl police uniforms, thigh highs and Sarah Palin naughty monkey pumps to perform the anti-terror groping. Ooo, daddy wants to take that big old thang on an airplane... giggle giggle... welcome to the new boo koo friendly skies. Etc.

Liked the Packer game, the Eagles game, and the end result of the Nascar "chase".

I was glad the Packers won just because I will always like the Packers. I don't really care about the Eagles or the Giants (or professional football as a whole anymore) but i was sorta glad the Jets won just because of the way they won and because they beat Houston. I don't pay any attention to NASCAR but I guess the results might have been different under the old rules - wasnt Johnson behind in points or something - but you win the race you win the champioship under the new rules... or something like that? Thats what the fans want? They want a Superbowl sprint hero? The only pro sports i can get interested in anymore is baseball.

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pansypoo said...

i am just happy when the cowpies lose. or other texass teams.